So what kinds of things can any postpartum mother face?  

• Cramping as your uterus returns to a non-pregnant size and shape.
• Bleeding and heavy vaginal discharge that can last for weeks.
• Breast discomfort as you initiate breastfeeding.
• Frequent urination or sweating as your body sheds excess fluid it built up during pregnancy.
• Potential pain when using the bathroom in the first few days.
• Possible mood swings or emotional sensitivity.
• Fatigue and sore muscles or joints can result from all the hard work of labor.

What extra challenges are associated with vaginal birth?

• Some, but not all, women have tearing of their vaginal or perineal tissues at birth. Sometimes these tears need stitches. Whether or not you need stitches, a tear may lead to some extra soreness for a few days or weeks. Appropriate rest and care of your tissue will help with healing and comfort. Even those women who do not have tearing often experience some soreness.

And what about women who have had c-sections?
A cesarean birth can be necessary and even life-saving, but it does mean major abdominal surgery, so in addition to all of the things listed above, there is significant recovery time associated with that procedure.

• Immediately after your c-section, some women experience side-effects such as grogginess, nausea, itching, numbness, or tingling from the medications used to numb your body during surgery.
• The incision in your skin will need special care. Staples or stitches often need to be removed several days after the surgery.
• In general, you will not be allowed to get out of bed for at least 12 hours, meaning you will need a catheter in your bladder and your movement will be very restricted.
• You will not be allowed to sit up for several days, even once you go home. This means you may need extra support as you learn to breastfeed lying down, and you are likely to need extra help around the house.
• It will take much longer to begin physical activity. In general you not lift anything heavier than your baby for 6 to 8 weeks; this means no carrying your baby in his carseat, lifting older children, or carrying heavy grocery bags.

The postpartum period is an important time for you and your family as you welcome home a new baby, and no one can deny the joys that this time can bring. However, it is important to understand that there may be at least as many challenges in the “fourth trimester” as there were in your pregnancy. Be prepared for this time by asking family members or friends ready to help do household chores such as cooking and cleaning or care for your older children and pets; this is a great way to have support in place so you can take care of yourself and bond with your new son or daughter.

So how does someone break the cycle?

Take care of yourself. Find time to dedicate to relaxation and hobbies you enjoy. Eat well, sleep well,
exercise. This can make you feel a lot better physically and emotionally, and might also reduce the stress
of wondering if you’re doing enough to help your baby be healthy.

Focus on the positive. Sure, there are things that don’t go the way we’d like in pregnancy, and there’s
lot of pressure associated with becoming a new parent, but there are lots of positives, too. If worrying
about a six percent risk has you on edge, try to focus on the other 94%. Anytime you find yourself
anxious about negative possibilities, try to flip it around to see if you can find more pros than cons.

Find support. We don’t always talk about our stress. Maybe we’re embarrassed, or we worry that our
anxieties will be stressful for the person we’re sharing them with. Whatever the reason, it may not
be best to keep your worries to yourself. Chances are your husband, mother, sister, or neighbor can
identify with at least some of what you’re going through, and if not, there are lots of online and in-
person support groups out there for you. Sometimes voicing a fear can be all it takes to conquer it. If
you can’t find support on your own, ask your care provider.

Don’t stress about the stress. Pretty much all pregnant women experience pressure at work,
relationship anxieties, financial worries, or pregnancy and parenting fears, so if you’re facing one or all
of those, know that you’re not alone. And if they can get through it to have healthy pregnancies and
babies, so can you.

Smile. Even if you don’t feel like it, forcing yourself to put on a false smile or laugh can release the same
neurotransmitters in the brain as genuine happiness. This can be enough to reset your mood and calm
your fears.

Ask questions. If there’s something you’re worried about, having more information might help, so don’t
be afraid to look for answers.

Take a deep breath in. Let it out. Repeat.

Written by Lisa Richards. Certified Nurse Midwife at the Madison Birth Center.

I wonder: has there been any particular increase in couvade as partners have become more involved in pregnancy? Perhaps it is simply a case of physically expressed empathy. Maybe it’s a response to the changes inherent in becoming a parent.

Are you a partner who’s had pregnancy symptoms? What happened in your family? What was your experience of labor? Share your thoughts and experiences!

As many expecting mothers can tell you, babies are conscious well before birth. Give a poke to a
pregnant belly, and they’ll poke right back. A fetus will respond to parents’ voices, and express delight
or disgust at music, arguments, even sleeping positions. Debby Takikawa’s documentary, “What Babies
Want: An Exploration of the Consciousness of Infants” explores the idea that babies are fully aware,
even in the womb. She explores how our earliest experiences can mold early childhood development
and life-long behavioral patterns. Interviews with psychologists, midwives, doctors, family therapists,
sociologists, community builders, and parents help to illustrate how babies are affected, both positively
and negatively, by their experiences of pregnancy, labor, birth, and infancy.
Birth experiences, though not often consciously remembered, can affect people through childhood and
into adulthood. This film examines a variety of different birthing practices current in the United States,
and how these can facilitate babies’ emergence into the world. Parents and professionals emphasize
the importance of natural, gentle birth whenever possible, and of maintaining the unity of the family
at birth. They share experiences of their own newborns immediate recognition of their parents at birth,
and the infants’ responses to their birth experiences.
“What Babies Want” emphasizes the importance of recognizing this consciousness and supporting
pregnant mothers physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Sobonfu Some, a keeper of ritual in her
village in Burkina Faso, shares and leads a ceremony welcoming women into motherhood, and their
unborn babies into their new community. The film also explores how parents and care providers
can communicate with a newborn to begin any healing needed following birth. We are encouraged
to consider what we can do as parents and families, communities, and a society to help our children
go through life as complete, loving and loved spiritual beings. How can we interact with infants to
enhance security and relationships with family and the world around them? How can we, as adults,
begin to acknowledge and process our own unique birth experiences?
“What Babies Want” is a great general introduction to the concept of raising secure and conscious
children. It challenges viewers to look at the choices they make around pregnancy, birth, and infancy
and determine if these choices help their children to enter the world and begin life in full support of
their needs.

• Do you use Facebook? You can “like” organizations such as Citizens for Midwifery, Childbirth Connection, Team Midwife, Choices in Childbirth, and the Coalition for Improving Maternity Services. Following them will provide lots of information and ideas in support of healthy childbearing options. There are lots of other organizations, too, so if a specific topic – such as cesarean awareness (ICAN) or doula support (DONA) – is important to you, look around.
• Volunteer your time, make a financial donation, contact groups you support to find other ways to make a contribution.
• Contact your health insurance. Find out what birth alternatives do and don’t cover. Write them a letter urging them to cover more options.
• Find out about your state regulations. Write a letter to your state representative encouraging support of midwifery and out-of-hospital birth options.
• Write to the media. Do you want to see a positive story about midwives or birth centers in your local newspaper? Or maybe you disagree with the way childbirth is portrayed on national television? Voice your opinion.
• Do you support breastfeeding rights? Support a group like La Leche League, or write letters to government encouraging protection of public breastfeeding if it’s not already a law in your area.
• Share your own pearls of wisdom with your friends and family (while keeping in mind that your experience may not be theirs). Encourage your loved ones to research options rather than accept the status quo.

There are lots of ways to contribute, and it’s up to you how and how much you want to get involved. You may want to make ongoing efforts, or commit to just one afternoon to making a difference. Either way, every voice counts, and yours could be the one that makes a change for the better.

Talk to your partner, if you can. See how he or she feels, and encourage them to take some time to  just sit in the idea of pregnancy as well. Talk together about what you hope for in your pregnancy, birth, and as parents. While many of your thoughts may change over the course of your pregnancy, the seeds that are planted in the beginning can help to shape the decisions you make, and your pregnancy, birth and parenting experiences. ]]> http://www.madisonbirthcenter.com/2012/so-youre-pregnant-take-a-breath-and-step-away-from-the-computer/feed/ 0 http://www.madisonbirthcenter.com/2012/caleahs-story/ http://www.madisonbirthcenter.com/2012/caleahs-story/#comments Mon, 09 Jan 2012 18:32:01 +0000 Madison Birth Center http://www.madisonbirthcenter.com/?p=1974 Why did I want a natural birth? Since I was young I’ve heard stories about procedures that women go through when they have a baby in a hospital. The very thought of having a needle stuck in my spine or having metal contraptions in and out of birthing canal was disturbing. The image I received from other women’s hospital experiences resembled more of an alien abduction scene. I just knew in my heart that there had to be a more natural way. I chose to have a natural birth so I could connect with the moment of bringing a new life into the world while remaining full aware and present. I wanted to remember that moment as a precious, safe, joyful, loving, and peaceful moment. I chose a water birth at the Madison Birth Center and I remember the moment exactly as I wanted!

What did I learn from the experience?

I learned that if I had confidence in myself, and that if I stopped resisting but relaxed into the moment I was capable of overcoming any bodily discomfort and know that my body will do as it should and my mind and soul could enjoy what was really happening. I try to live that way now- every moment in the present with my son. I value each moment with him and it’s been that way from the very moment I gave birth to him. Thanks to the many women I met at the Birth Center who helped build that confidence.

What it did for my baby?

How has it changed me as a person? My family? My perspective?

The hospital birthing process is seen as ‘normal’ for so many in our culture. Having a natural childbirth isn’t the route most people take, but, I know that it was the best for me, my partner and our son. Every time I look at our son I’m reminded to question conventional thought and follow my heart, intuition and the knowledge of old.  My partner was able to be involved and share in the birthing experience and I believe we became a family at the moment our son was born. SInce that moment our love has only grown.

I wanted to give my baby the best start possible in life. While pregnant I ate right, exercised, used natural products, so when it came to our birth I wanted to avoid chemicals and unnecessary medical interventions. I especially wanted to avoid a c-section. I found through research that I would have the best luck getting the results I wanted with a midwife and at a birthing center.

What did I learn from the experience?

I learned that I can do anything I set my mind to, and that my body is pretty amazing. It didn’t all go perfect, my sodium levels dropped and I did have to go to the hospital after six hours at the birth center, but that’s ok and I’m still happy with the way things went.

What it did for my baby?

My baby came in to this world and went straight to my arms. He was also greeted by his dad and our two wonderful midwifes and that’s it. He got to spend his first hours with his dad and mom and was never taken more than a few feet from us. I believe this made for a very peaceful transition in to his new life.

How has it changed me as a person? My family? My perspective?

Your nervous system (primarily your brain) controls all of your body functions, including what your body does during labor and birth. The part of your brain that controls your body has two systems, the sympathetic and the parasympathetic. You can think of the first one as the “fight-or-flight” setting while the second is nicknamed the “rest-and-digest” setting. These two settings compete, and when one is activated it inhibits the other. Labor and birth are controlled by the “rest and digest” part of your nervous system – the part that takes care of relaxed, everyday bodily functions. The “fight or flight” system is programmed to switch on when you sense danger, and when that happens, labor slows down until you feel safe again. Biologically, this may have been very helpful once upon a time. Imagine you’re giving birth in the woods and a grizzly bear appears. Now what? Your brain activates the “fight or flight” system so that your labor will pause until you can get out of the path of danger.

In a modern context, danger does not usually appear in the form of a grizzly bear, but in lots of subtle ways. Anything that feels threatening, stressful, or scary (even if it’s not as dangerous as a bear attack) can trigger the same fear response that inhibits the natural process and progress of labor. If you feel threatened or like you’ve lost control, the “fight or flight” system kicks in and tries to slow down labor until you feel secure enough for the “rest and digest” system to take over again. Because of this, yourvsurroundings matter. Anything that might be scary or uncomfortable– like certain equipment, people, interventions, noises, or even lack of information – can provoke fear and get in the way of your ability to relax.

The optimal birth environment is the one in which you feel the most safe and comfortable. You should be able to trust yourself, trust the setting you’re in, and trust the people around you. This sense of security can help you relax – both brain and body – allowing you to labor and birth most successfully.

Did you know that a man’s brain is rewired during his partner’s pregnancy and after his baby is born? Fatherhood can create new synapses (connections between cells) in the brain and can cause changes in hormones like oxytocin, cortisol, and testosterone. These changes may boost bonding and nurturing in dads. Some of these changes are very similar to things that happen in new moms, and some are a little different. A father’s behavior toward and interactions with his baby can look different than a mother’s – for example, men might be more likely to use physical or visual contact while mothers may be more likely to speak to their babies – but both men and women show distinct bonding behaviors that help them build a relationship with their child.

Dads might also use parenting and caring skills differently when moms are and are not around. Some research shows that men are better parents when left alone with their babies rather than when mom is watching. Spending time alone with your baby can be overwhelming for all new parents, but can help parents grow into their role. Giving dads the opportunity to be alone with baby sometimes can be good for the whole family. It’s important that your son or daughter gets the sleep and food that he or she needs, but love and brain stimulation are important, too. So what can dads do with a baby in its first weeks, other than changing diapers? When your baby is awake, read to him; it’s never too early to build literacy skills! Talk or sing to her, make faces at her or show her pictures. Take a bath or a walk together. Some things that are often emphasized with moms, like skin-to-skin contact, can be a great way for dads to build relationships with their babies, too. Follow your instincts!